The Letter
by FangirlingIsMySport
Summary: A short phan one shot about Dan writing a letter to Phil confessing his love. Cross posted on AO3


" _Phil, I'm not sure how to say this…"_ Dan groaned and deleted the words off of the page. 'It sounds like I'm breaking bad news or something!' He thought to himself. He slumped over his laptop and began again.

" _For the longest time, I have felt for you.."_ He pressed his fingers to his temples and hit delete again.

'Too romance novel-y. Come on, Dan, it's just a letter!' He thought. He had been anxiously attempting to type up a letter to Phil all day. He had loved Phil from day one, there was no doubt about that. What he wasn't sure about, though, was whether the feeling was mutual. They had always been close. Many people mistook them for a couple, which often prompted a sense of longing in Dan.

'What if he doesn't like me? What if I weird him out! Oh great, he'd be stuck with a dopey, lovesick flatmate.' He always thought, often getting annoyed at himself. After some time, though, Dan knew that he would have to tell Phil, whether he thought that Phil would love him back or not. Phil deserved to know, and Dan would go insane if he didn't get it off of his chest. So today was _the_ day. Today was the day that Dan would finally tell Phil everything.

"If I can ever figure out how to write this bloody letter!" Dan mumbled angrily to himself. Dan considered himself a sub par writer. Not bad, but also not great. He'd aced essays in grade school, but to him this was very different. This had to be _perfect._ He had been planning what he wanted to say for weeks now, but the words couldn't seem to get themselves out of his heart and onto the page. Dan took a deep breath and straightened up. He started typing away, his eyes darting across the words on the page.

Dan sighed deeply as he read over the letter once then twice. He had somehow managed to pour his heart out in a matter of one page. He smiled a bit to himself and hit print, scuffling to the printer, not risking Phil accidentally getting to it first. Dan held the piece of paper, trying not to crinkle it in his shaking hands. He started walking quietly towards Phil's room. He had the door closed; probably editing a video or just on Tumblr or something. Dan's heartbeat increased as he came closer to the door.

'This is it,' he thought, biting his lip. He reached Phil's bedroom door and creased the letter in the middle, folding it in half. Swiftly and shakily, he slipped the note under Phil's door. Almost instantly, he hurried back to his room, shutting the door behind him. His heart raced wildly and he checked the time on his phone. 10:23 pm. He was positive that Phil was still awake; he never went to bed this early unless he was sick or they had a flight to catch early the next day. He ran his fingers through his hair nervously and sat on his bed, waiting.

Phil sat propped up against his bed frame on his laptop. He heard a quiet shuffle and peeked over his laptop screen. There was a piece of paper near the entrance of his room that wasn't there before. Intrigued, he took his laptop off of his lap and placed it on the bed beside him. He slid off his bed, pulling a pillow off by accident. He walked over to the piece of paper and picked it up. He inspected it, turning it over to check the back. He unfolded the paper and saw immediately that it was very word-heavy. He walked back over to his bed, sat down and began to read the letter.

" _Phil. It's me, Dan, in case you couldn't already tell. You're probably wondering why the hell I'm writing you this, and to be perfectly honest I'm not sure myself why I felt the need to make this in letter form. I'll just get to the point… I love you, Phil. And no, I don't mean it in that 'brotherly-kind-of-way' shit. From the day you responded to my countless messages I sent you, I knew. I had always idolized you from your videos, hell, I was a full on fanboy. The day I met you in person was probably one of the happiest days of my life. I have no idea how I got so lucky to even become close to you, and it blows my mind to this day that I got to live with you. You blow my mind everyday, and you never cease to amaze me. You've always had my back and put up with my shit. When I was going all existential from Uni, you were there for me. You helped me push through it, and I don't know what I would have done without you. In my worst times, you were there. On my worst days, you would smile at me or crack a few incredibly cheesy and terrible jokes and I would be better. You have always had such an optimistic attitude and turn a bad situation into a good one. I have loved you for years, I suppose. I don't really expect you to feel the same way. Hell, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't speak to me anymore. So yeah, I just needed to tell you that._

 _Dan_

Phil couldn't believe his eyes. By the time he had finished reading the letter, a smile so wide had spread across his face. Phil had always loved Dan. He doubted there was a day when he _didn't_ love Dan. He had been trying to figure out a way to tell him for years.

'Casually mention it over dinner? Sit him down to talk? Make a video?' He had thought in the past. No time ever seemed like the right time. Phil wouldn't have thought in a million years that Dan felt the same way about him. His smile widened and he read it again, making sure he wasn't imagining things. He quickly got up and went over to his drawer. He pulled out a cat sticky note and scribbled something down on it.

Dan paced his floor silently. He checked on his phone for the time for the 10th time since he'd deposited the note. It read 10:28 pm. He paced some more, as thoughts raced through his head.

'Oh god, what if he's weirded out? Maybe he's ignoring me. Maybe I should have told him in person.' The barrage of thoughts continued, until they were interrupted by a small knock at his door. Dan's heart lurched into his throat. He swallowed hard and ran his fingers through his hair nervously. He approached the door and opened it, trying not to seem too frazzled.

"Oh, hey Phil," he managed to croak, trying (and failing) to seem casual. Phil outstretched his hand and revealed a cat shaped sticky note folded in half in the palm of his hand. Dan looked at it, unsure what to do for a moment. He picked it up out and Phil's hand and unfolded it.

" _I've always loved you."_

 _Phil_

Dan's heart skipped a beat as he read the scribbled message. He brought his eyes up from the note to meet Phil's familiar blue ones. Dan opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by Phil's lips meeting his. He barely had time to process what was happening. All he knew is that it felt right. When Phil pulled back, Dan was greeted with the same smile that he had grown to love. The smile that made him feel loved, and the smile that loved him.


End file.
